I am.

I heard something recently that makes me believe my ex-girlfriend is still hurting; I never wanted to hurt her. Truth be told, I’m softhearted and never want to hurt anyone, but it seems to happen. She’s no longer entitled to have an opinion on my life or my choices, nor do I have any obligation to explain them to her, but I can imagine her questions just the same, because I know the questions I ask myself.

Am I ready…
Am I strong enough…
Am I true enough…
Am I ME enough…
To love somebody else?

When I was in the 9th grade, we had to do a project; we had to pretend we had just graduated and plan out the next five years of our lives using advertisements and newspapers clippings. My partner and I had to find jobs, a place to live and create a monthly budget in order to survive. When I told my mom there would be no marriage or kids in my ‘future’ she looked me squarely in the eyes and told me, ‘if you wait until your ‘ready’ you’ll spend your entire life waiting and you’ll never do anything’.

She wanted me to know, that sometimes you have to take a chance and follow your heart. I don’t know what the future holds and I don’t know what challenges life has in store for me, but I know, without hesitation, that my life right now feels right.

I haven’t forgotten that there are things I need to do alone and things I need to do for myself; that lesson has been challenging for me, but I’m certain now, that I will not buckle.

And I’m certain that the love in my heart is something that can’t and won’t be ignored; that nothing and nobody in my life has ever felt so right, made me feel so free to soar and yet so safe to fall.

And so, when I ask myself, am I ready to love somebody else, the answer is clear.

I AM.

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